Congress Indicted for Fraud
The Kokopelli County Attorney's Office today announced that it had obtained indictments against all 539 members of Congress for felony fraudulent acts. The fraud was in association with the Social Security System.
"It is a crime commonly known as a Ponzi Scheme", explained Billy Joe Williams, Kokopelli County Attorney. "A Ponzi Scheme involves taking money from one group of investors and paying the money to another group of investors to create the appearance that the investment is real, when in fact it is a sham."
The way the Social Security System works, current workers pay Social Security taxes to fund benefits paid to retired people. "Old folks think they're just getting paid back the money they paid in when they were employed," Williams added. "This is not true. Congress calls the Social Security System a trust fund, when in fact they are stealing from current workers to buy votes from retired people."
Ponzi Schemes are illegal in all 50 states.
A spokesman for the U.S. Congress pointed out that Congressmen have legislative immunity, and can't be prosecuted for state crimes while serving in office.
"That's the problem with them gosh-darned feds, they are always above the law," claimed Williams."We'll just arrest the first Congressman that sets foot in Kokopelli County and see what happens," he added.
Kokopelli's member of Congress immediately canceled all trips back to his home district.
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Copyright 1997 by Hugh Holub.