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Thousands of self-help books have been written and made their authors and publishers a mint. But people are still wildly dysfunctional, promising thousands of additional self-help books will be written and published continuing to generate fabulous incomes for their creators.

What's wrong with this picture (unless you are a self-help author or publisher)?

The advice is worthless.

One can read about how to love better, get rid of their shadows, and lead a happier life. And they go on with their troubled lives, buying book after book looking for a solution to their inner pain and suffering.

The bandersnatch has the answer.

Quit trying to be perfect.

Quit trying to be someone you are not.

Get in touch with your primal spirit.

Remember, before humans evolved from apes, the apes evolved from something even more primitive.

What was that rude precursor?

Think back. Way back. Dinosaurs and the first mammals. Small furry critters that looked a lot like...rats.

We are, at our cores, rodents.

The root cause of just about all personality disorders is our inability to get in touch with our inner rodents.

We have carefully researched the subject, read hundreds of self-help books, and spent thousands on therapy to reach this conclusion. We are rats. Very smart rats. But rats nonetheless.

In order to assist our readership, we have compiled our own self-help book--How To Get In Touch With Your Inner Rodent.

We can guarantee that if you follow our advice, your life won't improve measurably. But you'll feel a lot better because you will learn how to accept failure, rejection, realize the controlling your anger is futile, and experience a never-ending serious of emotional distress...but happily since you have accepted your Inner Rodent spirit.